October 24, 2010

Quarter-life Crisis

1. Dulu masa kau sekolah kau pandai mencebik bibir bila mak tak bagi party sampai lewat malam. Kau mula berazam "hmmpphhh, bila dah 21 nanti, aku tak nak balik pun mama tak boleh kata apa-apa sebab aku dah besar dan kaya-raya". Masuk umur 23, kawan ajak lepak pergi mamak pun kau kasi warning awal-awal "Ok kot, tapi I kena balik sebelum pukul 12, esok kerja". Oh, kau juga belum kaya raya. Inilah Quarter-life Crisis.

2. Dulu masa sekolah kau rasa Modestos dah up gila babs dan Bangsar tu happening gila la (masa Form 2, Bangsar masih kira cool). Sekarang Modestos dah tutup, dan kau cuma pergi Bangsar sebab ada satu kedai tu nasi daun pisang dia mantap gila. Inilah Quarter-life Crisis.

3.Dulu masa kau sekolah, kau tak sabar nak kerja, sebab nak pegang duit sendiri. Sekarang kau dah bekerja kau perasan kau tak sempat pun nak pegang duit, sebab duit kau rajin berkelana ke tangan orang lain. Inilah Quarter-life Crisis.

4. Dulu masa kau sekolah, kiri kanan orang bagi nasihat jangan ada teman lelaki, semua tu tak elok, dosa, kau kecik lagi. Sekarang, kau belum lagi sempat upload gambar konvokesyen kau dalam fb, sedara-mara sudah mula bertanya "Bila nak kahwin?". Pastu kau rasa cam nak muntah dengar soalan ni. Inilah Quarter Life Crisis.

5. Dulu masa kau sekolah, bila kau tak puas hati pasal big bosses, kau kata "haisssyyy, cam ni ke duit mak bapak aku digunakan?". Sekarang, bila kau tak puas hati, kau kata "haisyyy, camni ke duit aku digunakan? Wait a minute, DUIT AKU????FATAFAKKKKK!!! $#@(*&@^&!%".Inilah Quarter Life Crisis.

6. Dulu masa sekolah, kau optimistik gila nak selamatkan dunia. Sekarang, nak percaya kau mampu selamatkan diri sendiri pun susah. Inilah Quarter Life Crisis.

7. Dulu masa sekolah, kau rasa buat benda jahat tu seronok gila. Sekarang ni, kau tengok orang yang masih hanyut kau geleng kepala pastu kata "bilalah, derang ni nak grow up". Pastu, kau pun tersedar yang hakikatnya, kau pun tadelah se-grown up mana. Inilah Quarter-life Crisis.

8. Kau mula rasa otak berserabut sebab banyak gila benda kau kena fikir sebab tanggungjawab mula bertambah. Nak kasi beban lagi, kau rasa kawan kau dah tak kisah pasal kau. Di situ kau silap. Bukannya orang tak kisah, tapi mereka sendiri ada masalah yang derang kena tanggung. Kawan- kawan kau semua sedang melalui benda yang sama macam kau(atau lebih berat). Sebab tu derang tak terdaya nak lebih-lebih macam kat skolah dulu. Tak percaya? sila lihat newsfeed kau. Boleh kata semua kawan kau tengah emo, bukan? boleh kata semua orang rasa dipinggirkan sekarang ni. Inilah Quarter-life Crisis.

9. Kau rasa semua orang lagi hebat dari kau.Kau mula rasa " aku dah hidup nak dekat suku abad, apa contribution aku kat dunia ni?". Semua orang tengah buat benda yang lagi best dari kau. Kau tahu kau kena bersyukur, dan memang kau bersyukur, tapi perasaan cemburu itu masih ada. Ironic gila, kawan yang kau rasa cemburu tu pun cemburu kat kau. Buru-buru cemburu? Hahaha. Inilah Quarter-life Crisis.

10. Walaupun sekarang ni kau rasa hidup dan dunia ni sungguh palat, masih ada sedikit ruang dalam akal dan hati kau yang berkata "It's not so bad, I think I'll make it, I just don't know how yet." Inilah Quarter-life Crisis.

According to Wikipedia, characteristics of quarter-life crisis may include

* realizing that the pursuits of one's peers are useless
* confronting their own mortality
* watching time slowly take its toll on their parents, only to realize they are next
* insecurity regarding the fact that their actions are meaningless
* insecurity concerning ability to love themselves, let alone another person
* insecurity regarding present accomplishments
* re-evaluation of close interpersonal relationships
* lack of friendships or romantic relationships, sexual frustration, and involuntary celibacy
* disappointment with one's job
* nostalgia for university, college, high school or elementary school life
* tendency to hold stronger opinions
* boredom with social interactions
* loss of closeness to high school and college friends
* financially-rooted stress (overwhelming college loans, unanticipatedly high cost of living, etc.)
* loneliness, depression and suicidal tendencies
* desire to have children
* a sense that everyone is, somehow, doing better than oneself
* frustration with social skills

Ada rasa macam kena batang hidung sendiri? Inilah Quarter-life Crisis.

October 11, 2010

Tips untuk suvive di Universiti itu.

I was watching L'arc En Ciel's TransASIA via Paris concert until I get to the part where Ken got hurt on stage, and I got so upset, so I decided to stop for awhile and recuperate. Drama gila, I know!!! *prays Ken would be alright to continue, cause he is such a sexy-guitar-wielding-machine*.

Since I have *ehemm* experience in surviving UIA, I shall bestow on you minions how to survive it, if you still have to lah (cepat ah sikit graduate! :P). This note could also be useful, if you have plans on sending your siblings/children/enemies to this institution. Do include this manual in their taaruf kit, seriously, it's the least that you could do. Wait a minute. APSAL KAU KEJAM GILA NAK HANTAR ANAK KAU MASUK UIA,HAH????!!!(I'm kidding mama and ayah, you know I love you)

I have no idea what's survive in Bahasa, is there a word for it in Bahasa? Maybe I should invent a new word. The word 'survive' shall be called "menglembu" in Bahasa until DBP decides to move their weight around and come up with new words. Or at least someone with a better command of Bahasa calls me out for being " tatau malu orang melayu tatau berbahasa melayu dengan hebat" which I totally am. Moving on, thennnnn.....

First day of Taaruf

Congratulations to your parents for finally succeeding in persuading you (read: dragging you) to the Matriculation Centre. You feel awkward and scared, I know. Why are these people wearing oversized kurung batik (it's UIA, duh)? Why are they of the same color? How are you going to survive the years? Don't worry! Look around you. Do you see anyone as miserable as you are? Do you see anyone that the parents LITERALLY have to drag them out of the car? Anyone bawling their eyes out? Approach these people. They're gonna be your friends for the rest of your lives. Scared with the overzealous speech that they gave during Taaruf? Call your Taman Tun, eh, I mean school friends to bitch and whine about it (preferably during the talk, so you can tune it out). ALWAYS go back home whenever you have the opportunity in order to remind yourself of who you actually are. Keep your friends close, and avoid eye contact with "THEM". If you're lucky, you'll get extremely wonderful roommates like the ones I had in Matric :-)

Making Friends

This is a tricky situation. Making new friends in a new environment is hard enough. Making friends in UIA is like trying to communicate with alien life forms, you never know whether they're really there or not. I don't believe that misery loves company. I believe company loves misery (huh?). Anyway, I find it helpful to just scan the crowd for people who stood out. Or, just be nice to your classmates in Matric. They're also going to be your friends for life. Also, if someone likes to start their sentence with "Omaigah, I bengang gila dengan UIA bodoh ni, k! Tadi....."

Those are confirmed keepers.

Dealing with the authority

This is an uphill battle. Scratch that. This is as hard as convincing Americans that we are not building a Mosque at Ground Zero. Or as hard as convincing Prof Obiyathulla to give you an A for International Finance. Yep, that hard. I have yet manage to find a way to deal with them, usually I'll use the "flight and flee" strategy. The moment they fight, I flee. But maybe there's a way to minimize the damage. Always have a vacant look. You know, the ones that communicates blind obedience and admiration toward what little authority that these clerks actually wield. Nod your head in agreement ALL THE TIME. Smile and say thank you, even when the only thing that they do is move their mouth to say "Akak pun tak tahu lah. Nak buat camne, dah takdir" when you can't register for your next semester's subjects because the system has blocked you from registering due to the supposed debt that you have with the University (even though when you pay your fees promptly at the start of the semesters, it doesn't matter)

Dealing with Pak Guard

I'm good at this!!! I'm so proud to say I've been driving my car since first year and up to the final semester I never did apply for any car sticker. The trick is, when the pak guard stops you at the main gate, buat muka comel (only applies to girls, sorry). Say sorry, park your car, go through the hassle of taking that yellow form. Now, everytime your car kena tahan, tell them "Saya duduk Nusaibah, pengetua selalu takde" and show them that form as proof. Repeat till next semester. In the event that your car kena saman, go to the office, appeal, and write this on the Comment Part. "Mak bapak saya pergi honeymoon/ jumpa orang sakit, jadi saya terpaksa berulang alik ke rumah untuk menjaga adik-adik saya yang masih kecil dan bersekolah. Saya tidak akan mengulangi kesalahan ini lagi". Repeat till final semester. But most of the pak guard is nice, when they stop you, just do the peace sign and give salam. They'll shake their head and let you pass. If you're a guy, I don't know, offer them ciggies? (don't do this if you're a girl, nak kena pelempang ngan pak guard?)

Dealing with studies and lecturers

Don't plagiarise other people's work. Sia-sia kau dapat scroll nanti, tabley nak rasa bangga, sebab kau tahu, hakikatnya kau masih bodoh. Be honest to your lecturer, even if that means telling them that the reason you didn't go to class was because you just don't have the mood for it. They're not bad, really. As long as you participate, and deliver, who cares if you don't come to class? Derang pun pernah Gila-Gila Remaja jugak, no matter how long ago that was. (Centuries, I presume? :P). I've observed people during class time, and I have to be honest (even if it means offending people), that people are just not into seeking knowledge. You're there in class, but you're never really THERE. I know I may not be the one to talk, but it's like your only aim is to pass/ get an A/ increase CGPA, which I vehemently disagree. People tell me that I'm smart, and they'll cite my CGPA as proof, but really I'm not. The reason why I got those marks weren't because I studied, or I was born smart like some would claim, but it was because I love to learn. My passion to know made me who I am. Let's see the cause and effect events. I love to seek knowledge, therefore I question. When I question, I understand. When I understand, I'm satisfied and happy. The marks was just the effect from those chain of events, it was never the CAUSE. Change your mindset, and i promise you, you'll feel that you truly deserve the scroll when you walk up to that stage on your Convocation Day :)

Wheeewww, that was long.